First of Firsts

I am doing something here I never thought I would do. I am going to write more, but that is not it. I am going to blog, but I have done that before, so that isn't it either. I am going to admit, to the world, that I am not who I have always tried to be.

I think, for the most part, people who are close to me have always thought I was the guy that had it all together. I've never had to work hard at anything, challenges are naturally easy for me, I made good grades, have had and continue to have great jobs, have an awesome family, cool kids, and live in one of the greatest places on Earth. Life, for me, has never seemed all that hard.

For all of that I need to admit, though, that I haven't had it all together. Nearly 16 years ago I lost a dear friend to suicide. The stress of living through that, finishing high school, starting to college, and working a job started to pile up. When that stress piled up to certain level, I experienced the first of what became a permanent part of my life- a panic attack.

The last fifteen years I have lived with panic disorder. I have suffered, I have caused suffering, I have worked, I have fathered, I have husband-ed, I have lived. Today, though, before all who will hear me, I admit it as part of who I am.

I want to share the story, I want others to hear the story, and I want you to share this blog with anyone else who might be interested in the story. I'll tell my history, my present, and my thoughts for the future. I will also veer away from panic disorder and talk life.

I hope you'll follow and share with others to follow. More to come over the next few days and Merry Christmas!